didja see this?

google search "list fox news apologies", and you'll garner 80k hits. huh. jackasses. i have a youtube clip of the fox tv program 'red eye' which is broadcast in the very early morning alongside infomercials for the 'ab energizer' and the 'sweet 70's soul cd', so you KNOW it's good!
here it is :

link to competitive yankee jackassery (youtube) there's a whole gaggle of retards spewing!

oh, but he apologized!

link to somewhat acceptable excuse (if you're a redneck) which was conveyed during a cbc news report.

i don't even get upset with this "journalist" & his peanut gallery panel who are all simply ignorant...lol! gutfeld seems to be an aging loser who couldn't get a show if it wasn't broadcast in the middle of the night on FOX, for cryin' out loud! even americans know that FOXtv is crrrrrrrrrrap, and i'd say the people learned their lesson with bush! (all be it, the 2nd time around...)

[if you'd like to hear this david bowie song, 'i'm afraid of americans', scroll down to turn off my music player first...]



canada's defence minister peter mackay has slammed this dude, and the rest of the uproar is amusing as well. i mean, look at the google hits from today alone! whatta twit! greg gutfeld, i mean. i hate it when bullies use the 'comedy' cap. funny is funny, and we would laugh if it was funny. comedy would be defined as:

1. 1. A dramatic work that is light and often humorous or satirical in tone and that usually contains a happy resolution of the thematic conflict.
   2. The genre made up of such works.
2. A literary or cinematic work of a comic nature or that uses the themes or methods of comedy.
3. Popular entertainment composed of jokes, satire, or humorous performance.
4. The art of composing or performing comedy.
5. A humorous element of life or literature: the human comedy of political campaigns.
6. A humorous occurrence.

uh, greg? not funny. i think this could be just another installment for your comedy of errors, you bill maher wannabe.

whomever needs to do the blessing, get on it! bless that damned country, and let's hope obama seeds some intelligence down south! i'm pretty sure we (north america) won't be entering any more senseless wartime fracas...that is, unless the states try to bamboozle the world's population again.
i'm thinking that's not gonna happen under obama. barack may not be perfect, and i may not be an expert, but i know bullshit, and i calls 'em as i sees 'em.

uh, this would mean that the collective jackass module should remove itself and let the rest of us get on with life. i think...

as ghandi would say:

“Be the change you want to see in the world.”

please oh, please let the blogging gods allow you, sir gutfeld, to stumble upon this humble post. if you happen to find yourself here while cruisin' the net for the 'newest facebook app' or 'best believed excuses file', i'd like to ask: what WAS your intention? heh. did someone forget to do their homework, greg? dummy.

canada's military HAS made contribution to this hellish effort.








i don't support WHY they're there - i support getting everyone the hell home before more people die.
hey, good ol' USofA! what if some country invaded your asses 'cause too many of you are a bunch of war mongering, greedy fucks? not so pleasant, right? get off your stolen horse, america, and let's be friends, shall we?

~peaceout~

p.s. please, please comment at will!

technorati?

what's this you say?
i just claimed my url on the technorati site....huh!

apparently, i can complete my openid claim by posting, so here i am.
any suggestions for me?

a poem, if you will...

bear with me, friends...this is the first poem with nature as a stimulus that i have ever written, with a glimpse of the scene that inspired it....


Today is the Day I Awoke



Mossy trees
with ancient grace
towering up above me.
Chirpy birds
are feeding babes
ducking through clouds, they flee.

Dewey grass
perking right up
again greeting spring, I see.
Cool filtered sun
shyly peeking,
I have a commodity.

Crazy boys
on the other hand,
trash my reverie.
Bounding down
the puddled road,
abandoned sense of carefree.

Life awaits -
way far away,
saddled with calamity.
I awake -
now spring is here.
To nature I pay MY fees.

~teague2009march


(c) cb'09

i shall return.

a beautiful weekend was had by all

yes, camping was such an awesome time. aside from a little wind and rain for a while on friday afternoon, it was well worth the effort. the boys were having so much fun, but were wanting to come home to play video games! ha! gotta put the brakes on that, i tell ya! tharen has discovered a new easy way to be lazy! he just half heartedly plays the games while snoozing, and the time just flies! silly gooseballs! but hey! who am i to talk? the only reason i can type this now is 'cause my little jared dude is watching 'super why' while jack's at school!

speaking of which, i have this valuable opportunity to be cleaning up all the camping wares and here i sit, smelling something funny. that is IF you think poopy diapers are funny.

i think it's a sign. i'm gonna go get rid of the rotten butt atrocity, tidy the troops' travesties, and totally take advantage of this crazy caffeine cascade of continual colossal coolness. uh, i mean i'm gonna go clean the house.

i'll tell you my story later tonight. stay tuned, sillies...there might even be pictures! (link is not my picture, but just a fine example of the area we camped in) i'll figure out to put pictures up here...it'll be a first for this newbie. i've noticed on my lovely janis' site that the pictures sure seem to perk it up a bit. or maybe it's her new layout, i dunno. pictures, though...my god, was it ever a much needed, gorgeous trip. next sunday is supposed to be nice, too....

♪♫ i went to the library & what did i see? ♪♫

holy crap my new library is crap!

it's been closed months and months getting this new haul over and was supposed to be beautiful. it's cold, uninviting and unorganized! i read in the local rag that they had their grand opening last week and i was so excited to have this library open again. the other one takes 20 minutes to drive to...blahblahblah. this cookie was not impressed. maybe i'll like it more when they get their signage up to point out the different sections. i only had 20 minutes to run in and grab my treasures, and i was honestly a bit put off! they were way over budget and way past schedule, so i think it's safe to say that the public was expecting a little more! a lot more! it is bigger, so they better fill it up with better books! i used to have to request books from the other branch often, but alas, here's my reading list for the next few weeks:

how to self publish and make money - crook and wise

self publishing 101 - debbie elicksen

building a website for dummies - david a. crowder

the everything blogging book - aliza sherman risdahl

career building through blogging - deirdre day-macleod

the huffington post complete guide to blogging - editors of the huffington post

&&&
the links i found for these books are cool. i'm totally gonna check more of this dude's site...

the life of hunter s. thompson, gonzo
- jann s. werner & corey seymour, with an introduction by johnny depp

kingdom of fear,
loathsome secrets of a star-crossed child in the final days of the american century
- hunter s. thompson

ha! first chapter is: "when the going gets weird, the weird turn pro"

bye...we're going camping.
in march.
in the west coast rain forest.
i'm so smart.

oh! and i have to watch ER now.

purely a distraction...

hullo.
yay! jack is feeling better today! i was so happy to wake up from a pretty ok sleep to hear him happy. he's been up and about and giggly and silly and most importantly - NOT PUKING! i won't count my pukey chickens, though...there are still puke bowls placed conveniently about the premises. he had a piece of toast and some ginger ale for breakfast, and it all seems ok so far *touching wood*.

jared has an attitude today though, holy crap! maybe he's getting the evil sickness...and i don't feel too shit hot, either. but hey. i'm a machine, right? ...right? i'm pretty sure i'll be putting him down for a nap fairly shortly to let his little body do whatever it needs to do. besides, tharen will be home in the evening, and he is SO totally the one who's gonna have to worry about bedtimes tonight. that is - IF i even let him in the house. jesus, you have no idea whatta jackass loser he can be. hence, the distraction.

i figured i'd tell you about what else is going on in my life. it's what lucy was referring to when she made her first call in forever a couple weeks ago.

my brother's mother-in-law has cancer. the kick-you-in-the-face-and-cackle-while-you-die kind. she got diagnosed about a year ago with hodgekins or non-hodgekins....i'm not positive. whatever's worse, i guess. regardless, something's ravaging her body with a fierce intensity. she's probably not gonna win this battle no matter how much of a tough bitch she is. that may sound a little harsh, but her and i have quite a history. i'm having a hard time deciding how i feel about it. i mostly feel bad for my brother and his family. no matter how i feel about her, she's still part of their family and it must suck to see anyone suffer the way she is. i won't go into detail here, but trust me - it's NOT pretty.

milly's mom had a couple rounds of chemo over the summer and fall, but then caught pneumonia. she checked herself out of the hospital to come down to be with family for xmas and basically stayed in bed the whole time. then, after she got home, i guess they had to call 911 because she couldn't breathe. she was taken into the hospital, then med-evac'd to a hospital near here where they do her kind of cancer treatment. they did a body scan to find that not only had the cancer come back big time, but she also has a leaky valve in her heart. this means they wouldn't do another round of chemo until she has surgery on her heart, which she couldn't do because of the pneumonia. isn't that just the sourest pickle you ever plucked?


weekly body scans had become par for the course, and the next one she had showed the cancer is more aggressive than they thought. milly's mom decided to go for the chemo after being given two months to live. she then decided that if the weekly body scan showed no improvement that she wanted to stop treatment. i'm pretty sure she's since recanted that desire, but milly is still out at the hospital every day to visit her because she took a leave of absence from her job.

the money situation for them is screwy. milly's money won't start coming back in for another couple weeks, and my brother harry had to go back to work early. see, he was on e.i. for a perpetual bad back, but only recives 45% of his wage. with milly's cashflow m.i.a., he had to make sure nothing suffers, especially considering no one really knows how long this is going to last.....or what milly's gonna be like when her mom finally kicks it. they have two kids, 12 & 16, that need to be cared for and attended to, and harry doesn't get home until 6 or 7 every night. and even then, he climbs right into his 6 pack and a doobie while tending to the horses, chickens and dogs.

i tried to go out and give a hand and brought them a bunch of groceries, but that was short lived. see milly's family is crazy, and NOT in a fun way. there are so many stories i could tell, but honestly, i want to do my best to forget them. milly's been in our lives for 22 years now, so there's probably bullshit over flowing that pandora's box. there's just one unforgivable thing in particular her mom did that completely scars my view of people (mostly her). that's what's making it so hard for me to care about her. the karma kops'll get ya! milly's aunt is staying at their house, and harry thought it would be best if i stayed away for the time being. see, the falling out milly's mom and i had was a catalyst for that whole family's fuck ups to come boiling to the surface and they all had discord up until the cancer thing came about. i say if you don't wanna be classed as a classless fool, then have some fucking class. but anyway, that doesn't take away from the fact that i'm hurting for harry, milly, my niece and nephew. i may not be able to go there while milly and her aunt are there, but my first reaction was this:

*** (c) ***

heartstrings

i'm afraid to make the phone ring
for fear it will stop your heart
my parallel reality vicarious here -
tries to imagine, but withdraws with a start

never any past shall cross my soul in this
any request i will own
half my heart breathes in your house -
i shall due care as it is my own

with one step back i observe the race
and pray with a heart on loan -
for when the chips lay down &
you're on broken ground
that you'll know where your heart is going

(c) teague.
~cb'09~
(for milly)
***

so that's what's going on in other areas of my life, and why i have the pic i do for my profile. my heartstrings are stretched.

a friend like hades on the day from hell

holy christ.
fairly succinct? definitely, yes. let me explain:

jesus. i'm writing this in shots in between the toilet festivals that have been going on today. jack is sick. as in- very. i got a call from his school's secretary this morning saying that i should "immediately pick up my son - he is vomiting." ...and by that, she meant he had vomited in the classroom, down the hall, and on the bathroom floor. i get there, and the covering custodian (who is 5 months pregnant, by the by) is cleaning up the loveliness. man oh, man. that's always a joy, hey?

so i bring my pukey boy home with the two year old in tow and he proceeds to climb right up into his bed. i could barely get him changed because he was so sleepy, and then maybe half an hour later he ralphs all over his bed! so, i had to get that all cleaned up. hah! MORE laundry! i tried to get jared to lay down for a nap, but he wasn't havin' ANY of that. instead, he decided to fall asleep behind my back at around 4pm while i was cleaning a puke bowl for the 8th time! now he's gonna be up until 11! i let him sleep because, well, i needed a freakin' break! i really am trying to keep them separate, because i want to avoid having two retchers if at all possible.

have i mentioned that tharon is gone for work for two days? yeah. the loveliness spews, pours, gushes and glows over here! you're jealous, i know. it's ok. i called him this morning, but he didn't get the message until after 3 this afternoon. he actually didn't even listen to his message. he just called me unknowing about his boy - not that he could do anything, i guess, but still...i know i wouldn't like it if i was informed of a day long pukorama after the fact!

and here's another shovel full: tharon and i got to talk for maybe five minutes, and then the POWER went out for almost two hours! i had no landline 'cause it's digital, thought i should save my cell battery just in case, and was starting to light candles to assess the dinner situation when it finally came back on. wow. that would've sucked huge - to go all night? brutal. i'm not sure what the problem was, but i contemplated heading to my mother's. i must've been a bit worried for that to happen! i actually haven't been able to get ahold of her all afternoon, and i'm not really sure what to do.

i was thinking i should take jack to the hospital, and i still might. he has no fever but is breathing fast, which would indicate an infection as opposed to a virus. if it starts coming out his butt, i'm outta here to get it tested. there was a time that we had jack in the hospital for an h.compilobacteria-somethin' infection in his tummy, and that sorta thing causes the ultimate loveliness of death, so i'm not taking any chances. the whole waiting room thing doesn't affect us yet, 'cause they take little kids in right away....especially if there are stomach contents involved.
i really wish tharen were here, instead of "worrying" his time away in the motel pub while watching the game! at least he'll get a good night's sleep tonight and can take over tomorrow! the job they're at is a union site, so they get kicked off the site by 3pm, which means he should be home around 7.....here's hopin'!

but at least i have good friends....yeah right! i got a call from one in particular, and i tell ya....if i could have reached through the phone to strangle her, i would've. my word, she irritates me! concurring with one of janis' recent blogs, weak women repulse me, and she be one of 'em. not janis, the other one....let's call her lucy. see, lucy's loose. she never used to be, but has since gone pathetic slutzo after splitting with her baby daddy of 13 years.

i've known her for almost 20 years. met in high school, and i was her 'cool' friend. well, that's what she says, but i think she was right. especially if compared to her. nasty, i know. sad, but true. she's (was) an awesome person, but i didn't really hang out with her all that much. i suppose our friendship budded in foods class after regina quit school. after all, i needed another smoking partner! lucy's the one who told everyone my metallica story, and still does! she's crazy.

wanna know what else makes her crazy? blowing off her nearest, dearest, oldest friends so she can beg attention from a fucking cokehead. that's right, cokehead. powder king, snort face, jack crack, rock jock - as in: cuckoo for the coca. we lost touch here and there, but always wound up talking again. the longest stretch of not being in touch over two years was because she had to follow her baby daddy on a run from some house owners who suddenly had their prized uh...tomatoes go missing. can you fucking believe it?

so anyway, the move north wreaks havoc on their relationship, and soon enough, all the stories come pouring out....he spends all their money on coke! they didn't even have a rent where they were living, but they regularly went without things while living in a house that wasn't suitable for the rats. she high tails it outta there on the presumption that she's coming to take care of her ailing grandparents, but who the fuck leaves their kids to care for family members that already have tons of family around? yeah, come visit....but she was here for 2 months!...and then came back again! see, while she was gone the first time, he had gotten comfy with some broad. and if you can believe it, she justified to me how this man stealing hussy could go in and sit with her kids...cuddling for movies, planning for birthdays....FUCKING HER MAN!?! i seriously started losing respect for her back then....she wasn't the kind of person i thought she was. i thought she had standards and morals. i thought that's why i liked her.

she decides she's leaving for good and moving back to this area, but can't go back to her previous town 'cause of the, you know, tom-rip. so she's out in a way further suburb and i haven't seen her except for when i go out there. one of the few times she did come here, she brought one of her coke heads with her and he fucking left some in the tent of ours they slept in! FUCK ME! that shit does NOT happen here. marijuana? yes. synthetic powdered pathetic? no. so, i would've reclaimed my adoration for her had she been a true strong woman and told him to eat it...but no. she kept doing him. i found out that all the time i never saw her 'cause of this guy she was just 15 minutes away trying to be cute enough to entice him out of his four walls to no avail. apparently this dude never wanted to do anything. he would do blow while sitting home alone with her, and she insists she doesn't do it. i'm not sure if i believe her. she'll do anything to be liked, apparently. she even asked me about ass sex cuz she thought it would keep dude happy enough to not do rails. fucking moron. you're only supposed to do that if he's EARNED the treat!

seriously, though. she's now (AND STILL!) trying to fuck some dude who she tried for months to be in a relationship with. granted, they did have a casual screwing affair, but she lives her life around it. she is not aware of the actual ground rules of a 'no strings' 'casual other', so she unknowingly broke every single one of them. THIS guy got caught red dicked screwing some other chick. lucy throws a fit, but is STILL trying to get this guy. and the ultra pathetic thing? he won't cheat on the twat he's with now, which is the one he 'cheated' with. she's insisting that it can be secret. and he won't do it. huh. i don't wanna be mean, here, but clue the fuck in!

i've been avoiding talking to her for a few weeks now. she's been calling me to make herself feel better about a situation that's going on in my life right now.maybe i'll write about that tomorrow. but anyway, while i'm on the phone with her, she's passive-aggrasively trying to make ME feel bad that i haven't responded to her. FUCK ME! she said in a message a couple weeks ago: "dude, i'm so sorry.....i had no idea.....whatever you need, i'm there for ya...." my non-verbal response to her was: "dude, you had no idea 'cause YOU'RE NEVER AROUND!" anyways, she still tried her shit even after i told her about the day i'm having! fucking retard. so i got off the phone fairly fast. it was the one time today that i was glad to hear damon yelling out for help. after hearing that she's still trying with that guy pretty much turned me off. at first i thought i might like to talk to her finally, but no. after the pathetic info and the guilt trip, i would've MUCH rather cleaned another puke bowl.

jack's finally sleeping now....it's after 11pm. he layed on the living room floor literally ALL day. and the puking! at least a dozen times. my poor, sweet guy. every time i lay with him, i imagine pulling all the germies into my body. i can deal. i'm a machine.

o - and tharen and i had an argument 'cause he's a drunk fuck. i'll tell you about that later, or else it would be it would be a giant blob of black tar hate right now. trust me.

how was my weekend?

so here's the deal....i don't know exactly what i'm writing today. many ideas, but no set theme. a breakdown of my weekend, if you will - but it wasn't really an exciting one. you'll have to wait for next weekend for that!

so friday....what happened friday? tharen was at a practice with tossing logic, so......laundry. loads and loads and loads of laundry. fun stuff. i stayed in and was supposedly supposed to get stuff done, but i sat in front of my computer for three hours and didn't accomplish much. OH! except that i shopped this blog around a little and got an excellent review from kim. (thanx!) so that's a plus - i didn't think this would be very interesting to someone who doesn't know me.

saturday daytime sucked it, mostly cuz i got rooked out of my babysitters. i had been putting off stuff to do, and tharen worked, so i didn't get much of anything done AGAIN. but then it was ok, cuz i got to go on a date with all my guys again. we went for wicked burgers and then swimming at the pool, which is always fun. jack's getting closer to actually swimming now, so that makes me feel great. swimming is probably one of the most important things i think you can teach your kid, obviously. sometimes i meet adults who don't know how to swim and i'm like: wtf? how does that happen? who raised you? weird.

sunday was cool. we were gonna hit the chinese new year parade, but the weather wasn't cooperating, so i got to sleep in! we had a birthday party for waylon's girl's daughter to go to, and that was ok. i suppose the babies were cute, heh heh....no other ones there besides ours and martin's. also odd, but considering the age of waylon's girlfriend, probably not many of her friends have kids yet. i'm kinda glad i got to see her outside of the bar scene. i'm having a really hard time deciding how i feel about her. ....but that's ok - it seems as if she likes herself enough for all of us!

anyway, then we went to a friend's house for a super bowl party....that we almost jammed out of...and won $250!! so THAT was the super coolest part of my weekend! the hosts, our friend's neighbour, have the same last name as my maiden name, AND their house is for sale! it's a very interesting home with tons of the amenities we're looking for.

does anyone have 100K i could have?

superstardom

so i just got a message from a friend on a social networking site we all use. technically, it's for tharon, but i couldn't help but reply before i even talked to him this time. contrary to their belief that i just go ahead and make decisions FOR him, he usually hears about it all and has the same response. when our opinions differ, i go with his decision because it IS his decision. there have been times where i didn't respond to the juvenile banter specifically because tharen said not to...he always knows before i send something in response to them....except for this time, and i only did because we've already been through this with their management team production proposal.

i talk to tharon usually several times throughout the day because otherwise it's hard having a conversation while the boys are accosting their daddy after being gone all day. therefore, me being appointed as tharon's logistical whore and daytime jackass liason, i do the communication. the message was between a friend and each of the guys in the band which i will name.....'tossing logic'. if you knew the scenario, you'd accept that this is a fully deserved name. they toss logic all the time for the sake of being right, more important, or just plain louder.

anyway, he said exactly what i said (no) before i even told him i replied, so it's good to know we're on the same page, heh heh. at first half the guys were against, but read on:

see, a handful of months ago, tharon's band was offered a contract with a ummm, DISreputable agency. it's not even that they have NO reputation, but the one they have is questionable, sketchy and spotty. trust me, i looked into them. and by that, i mean i found out more than google can tell me. i'm just not interested in attending functions where we have to worry about being shot because of the other talents' entourages throwin' shapes over a homie deal gone bad. all the singer, waylon (named for the fact that he's always wailin' about somethin') thinks about is the fact that he's known him for some time and doesn't wanna think bad things. oobie boobie, grow up. your good friend got involved with the wrong company, waylon! but i can't blame him for being hopeful. this is his first band, for cryin' out loud!

beside the sour tone i detected upon my mention of the company in question to my sources, the contract they gave them to look at was retarded. severely. severely fucking retarded is what i loudly said! then, they went and paid $500 to their industry lawyer to tell them just that. i think his exact quote read, "run as fast as you can & stay far, farrrrr away from these guys." but why would you want to listen to me? teague's just a drunken freak takin' on like the paparazzi and flappin' her yap when you act like a freak. don't want me to call you a fucking embarrasment? then don't cry on my doorstep.

anyhoo, the management/promoter/pigslut guy has taken it upon himself to market the band and for reasons unknown discuss this with the friend -whom i shall name suzy, as in suzy mary sunshine. she has zero experience outside of the real world...she worked at the gas company for 25 years before taking an offered buyout while her 18 year old son was being held while on trial for murder. yeah, that's what i said. i'll further contemplate the confusion that is her later, but suffice it to say that she has better things to worry about. she's the kind of woman who needs distracters from real life so as not to have to deal.

anyway, so we'll see how that pans out. tharen's at practice/bitch session right now. i guess the guys want to hear the scumbag out, and we'll see if my friend is still going to be involved. well, waylon would sign anything 'cause he's a puppy. the drummer, Monty, is getting old and has never been on a 'tour' past the valley. lead guitar? well, martin's been past africa already, & he would take a day off work for the opportunity to skepticize! lol! anyway, they just say they wanna promote tossing logic. i'd say eat me, but then, i'm not in the band.

janis told me a few things about uh.......clay's his name, the music group dude....apparently he's quite a dirty dog, that fucker! nothing that would affect musicianship, however the kind of cheap ass, fuck you over, slick prick shit that makes me wanna retch. not interested in dealing with fucking gross pose boyeeez to make a living. they (t.l.) are so above it, but can't see how high up they are because of the massive cloud of suckwhine they're sitting on. i SO wanna tell you who they are so you can see all the media they're in. i'm talkin' weekly t.v., big budget movies, respectable sales, online merch store, active gigging, radio play...they have: 2 albums, investors, production crew, and a networks comin' out their sweaty ying yang. so what's the problem?

i think i feel above it because tharen's always got other stuff going on. and some of the songs he's written give me a tingling....and not just in my pants! i know what he's capable of, and wonder what could be happening if he were more ambitious. he likes to talk about having no time now, which is totally true, but why not before? i mean he was 33 before i came around, and i've never stopped him from jamming or recording weeks. i do nothing but encourage it unless i get one of my gut feelings about people. i'm not sure why, but it's usually right. anytime i've not listened to my gut is when i've gotten myself into trouble. all i have to do is learn how to stop for a fucking second sometimes to give my gut an opportunity to speak!

i KNOW t.l. can be good, but i don't know if it will be. i'm not sure how much more time should be wasted on this project but alas, it is not up to me. maybe one day i'll let him make me sing and we shall enchant the globe, HA! he says it's good, but i'm, not sure i have the cahonays (?) to entertain a crowd knowingly. one at a time, baby, one at a time.

g'night, silles

sweet, sweet quiet...i love you

it's quiet in here again. jared is napping and jack is over at his friend's house. we were invited too, but i knew i wanted this free time. i really, really, really enjoy my alone time. i used to crank tunes, but now i like it quiet at least for a while, even when the baby isn't here sleeping. if you don't have little boys, you have no idea how constant the frenzied play is or loud it gets. got girlie spawn? squeals aside, you've got it pretty easy until your little miss attitude pants turns into a raging banshee at the tender age of 11. one minute you'll want to cradle her as you snuggle in bed for one of the last few times followed shortly by wanting to brick up the window leaving only 6" holes for fresh air and the doorway to her room with easy food tray access. ensure that phone and computer possession are hers, and she might not even notice. gimme a minute and i'll figure out the bathroom situation....

anyhoo...boys! yeah. they're awesome and i'm glad i have them rather than the all to common hormone bucket syndrome suffered by the female of the species. i'm just not really sure how long this whole autopilot thing is gonna work! lol! at this time i choose not to delve into why i'm positive i got that opinion because of how things were with my own mom. i just don't wanna repeat that, is what i'm sayin'. my own monthly withdraw/attack ebb and flow coupled with my mother's menopausal mania was a treat to endure, holy christ.

*(*this pause was brought to you by a.o.a.d.d*)*
***(*adult onset attention deficit disorder*)***

so. iconoclast, hey? yes, that's a word i like alot. it's kinda how i am most of the time. loosely translated, it means i hate stupid shit and i have an articulate side. it means have a sense of my own ideals and don't parrot popular notions. i live up to what i believe in, as should everyone. if i think something is fundamentally wrong, i've been known to do something about it. through the process of life i've learned that maybe sometimes i could've spoken louder, and sometimes not at all. i've had times where i got too emotionally involved in things that really aren't affecting me and it wound up hurting me instead of solving anything. at one point i thought i should just not care about people anymore. if i wasn't involved with anyone, then i wouldn't know how stupidly their actions were affecting their lives.

Iconoclast

I*con"o*clast\, n. [Gr. e'ikw`n image + ? to break: cf. F. iconoclaste.]1. A breaker or destroyer of images or idols; a determined enemy of idol worship. 2. One who exposes or destroys impositions or shams; one who attacks cherished beliefs; a radical.

Synonyms: critic, dissident, image-breaker, non-conformist, questioner, rebel, revolutionist, sceptic

not long into that, i figured out it was wrong thinking. aside from being human and hard wired for interaction, i have kids who need good people around them. people who make good choices most of the time, and have morals as strong as mine. not identical to mine, but as strong. that's important to me. i just remove characters as i see fit and keep living for the three most important men on the planet. but i'm still an iconoclast in every way i take it to mean. there are also definitions of destroying one's religious symbols. it's not like i would vandalize humanity, burn a cross, or some other cretin-like activity, but i'm also not gonna get into any well deserved debate about a book written by a bunch of guys [read: the bible] unless it's before discussing evolution while we picnic beside a documented 10,000 year old bog that's not too far from my house. believe in what you want, just don't tempt me with ugly. i don't like it and i won't have it.

i wrote some prose once about religion. it starts out...'i don't believe there's not a god', includes the phrases, 'if there IS a god i don't wanna piss him off', and 'the human religion', and ends with, 'i am my own church. welcome to my temple.' somebody once told me that was egotistical, and i couldn't agree more. yeah, i have an ego, why don't you? there's nothing wrong with liking yourself. more people should, and maybe there would be less misplaced pride spinning this carnival ride of a planet.

i've got to get my poop in group now. some quick housework, then off to get jack and the babysitters to bring home. i'll have more time this afternoon to get things done in the basement. i need to get that project overwith before i have an aneurysm, and it's comin'...i can feel it!

bathroom solution:
move her room to one beside a bathroom wall, take said wall down, and complete brick laying procedure. trust me, it'll be easier that way.

home is where it's at

i've made headway on the home front!
yesterday i kicked ass doing a million things (all at the same time, even!) and reminded myself how awesome i really am...heh heh...or how much of a SLACKER! there were so many little things that i never have the time to do, what with all the enthusiastic picking of my nose [read: voracious reading] and smelling honeysuckle dew drops [read: smoking] i do on a daily basis. i regularly employ contemplation of using my night owl super powers - pulling all nighters to accomplish things such as totaling receipts, cleaning the basement, computer upkeep/catch-up, or organizing the 15,964 toys we have so they're not just a jumbled pile of crap that can't be played with. and man, this place needed a dusting! in my defence, though, this is THE dustiest house i've EVER lived in - and there have been many abodes. approximately 15, to exactly guess while hedging a bet. i lived in the same house with my parents between the ages of one and when i got the hell out, so most of the nomad-type behaviour occurred in the first 5 or 6 years sans apron strings.

i suppose i could figure it out....i actually have them all written down somewhere in one of my lists. i moved out about 42 seconds after i turned 19 on january 1st, the year nineteen ninety-wicked! my first place was the apartment my best friend and i had fantasized about for three years. we naively explored our ideals and made sisterhood promises never to be drawn assunder. yeah fucking right! it took the hussy patrol only a few short months to annoy the fuck out of me.

eating my food, not paying bills (including a phone bill worth 8oobux) or rent for two of the four (4!) months, showing up to mess the place with her cock du jour, using my laundry soap and stealing my clothes approximately once a week, and generally fucking with my impression of people on a whole. i mean, this was supposed to be my BEST friend, right? and we were...oh my god, were we ever! we were always together since the day we met. even still, though she offered to return my UNDERWEAR, i just could not continue in the farce. i was pissed righteously off. and let's be clear - i have zero problem being righteous when it comes to shit like stealing my much stretched mother love bone tapes. you don't fuck around with a girl's 90's love rock! she (let's call her.....regina) had criticized my love of seattle based ear fodder many times. she looked me up and down with my mudhoney t-shirt, lovingly frayed cut offs worn over black tights with 18-hole doc martin's throwing my feet forward on every beat matt cameron ever threw... and scoffed.

in re-jay-jay's defence, that was coming from a girl who had influenced me at one era in my life to wear white short tights over a white thong while sportin' a teeny cropped cherry red sweater, slouch socks and black l.a. gears & boppin' to either skid row, britny fox, or l.a. guns . i may not be over endowed with jiggly northern slopes, (thank GAWD) but thanx to several years of gymnastics, dance, free weights, and not being a lazy fucker, everything i did have was in exactly the right spot. yes, i am one of the original and rare pre-millenium early 1990 thong wearers! (- but i wore them even before that cun- oops, i mean regina came around...haHA, just not after she 'borrowed' them! *pickle face* ew!)

i met regina in foods class circa mid-september, grade 11. i was up to my usual shenanigans of not attending classes the first week or so of every year -

"pardon me, where was i? well, my class got switched, so i think i might've been in mechanics at that time yesterday, sorry! i've got things straightened out now, don't worry..."

- and i sat at the only available spot left....beside regina. okay - first impressions? she's super fox hot, seemed cool and was lookin' at me the same way i was lookin' at her. a little bitchy and territorial, but with a swift recognition that combat would be futile - we were equals. it was l-u-v luv at first sight. (i'm not usually competitive, but if someone wants to pull rank on me? oooee, mama, you'd better be good!) for some reason probably also relating to attendance, i had wound up with one of the much coveted huge lockers to myself and moved her in promptly. we were then inseparable for the next few years, save for time spent with respective boyfriends which came and went.

she and i had quite a time, we did. starting at 16, we went to many, many concerts, stayed in the city, went to bars, had musician boyfriends, and had an avid common interest in rear of the stage festivities that seemed to happen after shows. that would turn out to be the bane of our relationship. i can honestly tell you that not even one boob was flashed, nor cock was sucked by myself to get anywhere i ever got to go. that was regina's department. some of her more notable fucks range from popular local rock stars (unnamed with purpose for protection of my secret identity) (hey, where's my remote control?...) to the likes of sebastian bach and jason newstead, among others. a new generation of pamela des barres, groupie-dom if you will...as a matter of fact, that's what i should've named her! lol, but regina suits her, trust me.

most of the reason behind our demise was one mr. newstead, sadly enough. she was calling him in places like fucking ohio and fucking missouri in the fucking afternoon, damn it! and she was gone half the time because she was driving all over who knows where to follow him around with some other chick she met in alaska doing the same thing, only the other cun- oops, i mean regina's friend was with lars and multiple roadies.

regina and i went to metallica's 1990(?) snake pit tour show and got spotted by roadies playing hackey sack out back of the venue. of course we were back there by the busses, 'cause that's where the cool kids hung out. they asked if we wanted pit passes for the big area in the middle of the stage reserved for vip's and high cash customers. after calmly and rationally discussing it we said in perfectly coifed unison:

"FUCK YEAH!"

fast forward to near the end of the show and jason newstead's guitar tech came and introduced himself while holding out two round back stage passes. we kinda looked at each other in disbelief - nay, SHOCK - and came out with another perfectly coifed, all be it sweatier (thank you, i.c.e. mist):

"FUCK YEAH!"

fast forward to us sitting and waiting and waiting and sitting and almost wanting to head home 'cause we still had a long drive. we actually got stopped by the same guitar tech dude (i keep thinking his name was rick. no, for real...) when we got up to go. he told us we had to stick around, and not long after, their royal metal majesties graced us with their presence. well, everyone but james. we never did see him again outside of show times through our adventure, at least the time i was around for, anyway. he had taken off to go on a fishing trip at a nearby popular stretch of river just outside the suburb i grew up in. same spot i used to fish with my dad, actually.

anyway, to slap on another thick layer of shock, jason hands his tech a room key and says, "just in case," then turns to us and asks if we would like to join them at their hotel for a party. uhhhh, as soon as i picked my jaw up, i said:

"FUCK YEAH"

so, the next little portion is a bit of a blur, but it mostly consisted of regina and i running and leaping to her car and squealing. we pulled into the underground parking at the hotel and when we put the card key up to the thingee, we heard:

"good evening, mrs, case. will you be needing assistance to your room this evening?"

well, smack me up and call me a whore. jason didn't say 'just in case.' he said, 'justin case', get it? mrs. justin case? just in case.....just in case you wanna make some little metal girl's dreams come true, hand her this key and give her a week she'll never forget! while straightening out our autographed slash-sided spandex shorts and half tops, we got into our room and tried to calm the fuck down. we stayed with them that night, drinking with jason and lars and their crew in one of their rooms. the next day we hung out mostly with jason going shopping and eating, all the while with two to four bodyguards with us who even stood outside bathroom doors and escorted us to the ice things in the hallways. weeeeeeeeird. cool, but weeeeeeeeird.

there was another show that night, so after while we were waiting , instead of sticking around in the mess of other fans in the reserved area, we got to go for a totally insane cab ride with rick. he was giving the cabbie 20's to go through red lights and make other such illegal moves while cranking his stereo. it was hilarious! i hope he wasn't too terrorized. though the probable extra 200 bones he had in his pocket by the end of the ride made it all worth while.

the next day we had to head back home, but had plans to meet them in seattle with rick's personal cell brick #, then onto portland and oakland, ca. we had so much fun that week on such a surreal level. sometimes it still seems like it was a dream or something, even when i look at all the autographed passes, t-shirts, programs, and hotel stuff. we didn't have a camera to use, so we bought a couple throw away ones. one of them had fucky film, but we got 5 good shots(which the cun- oops, i mean regina also scooped when she left our apartment the last time) and the other one disappeared into the void on our travels, so i have no visuals, save for the plays in my head. regina had quit school the previous year, actually not long after we met, so she was free to go to alaska and a couple others dates. i, however, had to resume my previous career as a scholar. one day i'll tell you about my high school experience, but right now i'll just throw in the brew that i was an honour roll student. none of my escapades stopped me from letting anyone think i was stupid. usually.

the following year metallica came back on a tour with guns and roses and we got a call from rick, if you can believe it! we had tickets and a room waiting for us! tres cool, non? say it with me now:

"FUCK YEAH"

so anyway, long story short, this was when regina racked up my phone bill and went to butt fuck, iowa with her new friend that had latched on to her in alaska. luckily, i had a friend who had just bought a 3 bedroom house in a 'burb closer to the big city, which is where i ultimately wanted to be. in the city sucking all the energy in and spitting it out frantically onto a page - paper, a napkin, anything i could find. by that i mean writing. alot of poems and prose, specifically. i rented a room at my friend's house for a few month until i got a place in the city, and moved on.

i've only seen regina a few tmes over the many years since then. at one point we attempted a reconciliation, but she wouldn't pay her fucking phone bill, so i took her to court for it. then she didn't like me very much. awww, poor regina had someone make her be responsible for a change....aww, oobie fucking boobie. eat me. there's a few other tales i could spill about why i named her cun- oops, i mean regina, but i don't feel like it. i wouldn't feel that way without good reason.

so! let that be a lesson to my life mates:
watch your treatment of the fine teague, or you shall be emblazoned with a moniker suitable for many, many jests. for example:
dick, peter, twaterelli, or fuckface.
or regina.

you know that rhymes with vagina, right? and a vagina is sometimes referred to as a cun- oh, never mind.

so much

i really, really, really shouldn't be blogging right now, damn it! i am SUCH a procrastinator, it's pathetic.

really.

i have tons of housework and just picked up my new babysitters (sisters, 13 and 14). they're tharen's workmate's kids and they've known us since b4 the boys were born. they have the boys outside right now, so it's actually quiet in here. they team up quite well, and i can see this working out just fine. there's a mellowish one and a wacknut one, just like mine!

you'll probably find that i tend to write sporadically and at odd hours. keep in mind that i draft-draft-draft, analyze-analyze-analyze before i post. it could very well have taken me three to eleven days to compose whichever post you see. i tend to refer to myself as the spelling police on grammar patrol, so deal with it! ever since i got mommy brain, i am constantly in the process of completing any number of chores, tasks, errands, games, picture or craft projects simultaneously at any given time. trust me - it'll hurt me more than it'll hurt you.
on that note: breaktime! (see?)
ever hear of adult-onset a.d.d.? jeezuz.

~7 minutes later...
i just tried to call my wondermuffin and she's probably got the phone turned off so she doesn't have to hear the beeping from my LAST message! lol! so it's her fault i'm blogging now. actually, you can just go ahead and blame most things on juicycake. she's a trooper! AND she knows what's up, so don't fuck it! (ahem - unLESS she tells you to!)

anyhoo, she's got issues with the pseudonym sera. huh. so now i have to think of a new one for the super duper dork. huh. whatever shall i choose? i wanted to use one particular name, but it would be glaringly, blazingly identifying, so NOPE! then i thought: hmmmm what about hummer? *hahahaha* seriously, it has to do with a gift, but NOPE!

i also have to take into account the conglomerate of US. does KAREN sound good with teague? no. does EVELYN sound good with teague? how 'bout ALICE? NO! well, i was thinking about it and i came up with janis. janis 'n' teague...teague 'n' janis....tj...jt....it'll have to do. it suits her, trust me. joo like?

anyway, onto my new hobby. blogging is a little odd for me. i never really got into the whole cyber community thing. i chat and communicate online with friends and everything, but never felt the need to socialize with strangers, i guess. never had a problem finding a date or plans on a friday night, so i guess i thought i was too busy for that or something. sometimes i think that i might've been better off, though! some of the SHIT i've been through dealing with you humans is revolting! i'm sure you'll hear about some of it, but i'll also fill you in on the good times.

i don't really feel like this is communicating, but i keep in my mind that SOMEONE might read this, so i'm writing to YOU. comment at will, but prepare for my delete if you're rude or completely WAY to concerned with MY life choices.....and i'm not talking about differing opinions - i'm talking about disrespect. i've had enough of that, i tell ya, and i am SO not in the mood. i'm looking for encouragement and critisism...ix-nay on the ackass-jay! if you wanna fail on me, you'd better come up with some good ammo or i'll destroy it. that's just what i do. and i refuse to have a battle of wits with an unarmed person...wrap your head around that. this is ultimately for me, so eat it. i may just keep printouts and publish a hard copy....i've been told more than once that i should compile my brain blurbs...maybe, maybe...now enough with the threats cuz i'm starting to scare myself! *hahaha* it is what it is. judge not, pickle-face!

last night turned out to be some good fun. i got to go on a date with all my boys! tharon's drummer's girlfriend's (!) teenage son had birthday recently and we all went out to a restaurant/pub for a party. there were a few different musician friends doing acoustic sets, and it was perfect for all the kids to run around and have fun. jack was such a little gentleman, opening doors, helping me with my chair and asking me to dance...i was in heaven! except for him peeing his pants not 30 minutes after we arrived, he had an awesome time...we just cleaned him up and had him sit by the fireplace for a while! *hahaha*

little jared took a few to warm up, but as usual turned into his normal screeching monkey self soon enough! he is an entertainer for the masses, i tell ya! it sure was nice to take them to a restaurant scene where they could have fun without getting dirty looks from all the perfect parental units! don't get me wrong, they're normally really good in restaurants, but i mean that we had one whole side of the building to ourselves, so they could have freedom....the waitresses were really good there,and so was the food.....not to mention the entertainment, which i refrain to name. haHA!

a miracle happened last night, too....tharen's band was all in one place together for a SOCIAL event! that NEVER happens, oddly enough. this band has one of the weirder dynamics i've come across in my 20 year career as a band aficionado. aside from rehearsal, they don't really hang out all together. i love the music they make, and that's another odd thing, because they hardly jam it seems! sometimes i wonder how they do it, but i guess that's the magic! i'd love to plug them here, but NOPE! absoLUTEly NOT! i'm sure there will be many a bitch session regarding those pea brained whiners.

again, don't get me wrong - i'd say most of these things to them, but just don't wanna fuckin' HEAR about it! just trust me, you and millions of others would love them. i love them all in their own special way, some more than others, but aside from one (well, two) of them, i could do without. it regularly seems to tharen that he's wasting his time. someone's always whining about something instead of just getting up there and loving it like they say they do. tharen's not even playing the instrument he's been given the gift for, and they act like they're doing him a favour by letting him have one of his own fucking cd's!

that part could be part tharen's fault, too, because he chooses not to discuss the other projects he's always got going on. i think if he did, they might realize he's a lot more valuable and has people knocking on his door willing to PAY. if tharen were to get the golden opportunity, i could totally see them BITCHING about how it affects THEM. i say: GOOD RIDDANCE! *hahaha*
it's hilarious. why can't they just have a good time and not WHINE so fucking MUCH?
me no know, and it hurts my head. and with all the girlfriends, ex's, ex baby daddies, and pathetic going on, sometimes i wanna retch.

so i'm gonna go have another break
byebye4u

story time

i don't even know where to begin! should i just dive in and tell a story, or should i tell you about myself? why don't i just tell you a story about myself?
i'm 35, married almost 6 years, have two boys, 5 & 2 3/4, and freakin' TIRED! i don't have a job outdside the house, aside from the minimal volunteering i try to do. (at least I think it's minimal...apparently it's a helluva lot more than some people will get off their asses and do, so i've learned) i like a clean, if not, tidy house, but usually these days i'm thinking this place is three minutes away from disaster.
my husband, tharon, 40, is a hard worker, playful dad, faithful (i think) and most of the time a respectable husband. we most DEFINITELY have issues though, as you're sure to read. we met through someone we used to know around nine years ago with a mutual attraction, but nothing happened until about a year later when we 'hooked up', if you will. it was a fairly turbulent ~all be it passionate~ relationship and i'll tell you right now - i'm not sure why i married him. there were lies, cheating and a general NOT caring about my person. i cannot explain that attraction. i took more shit from him than i ever got from all boyfriends comBINED! i finally decided to move on and dropped off all his things at his house and didn't take his calls for a week. miraculously, things began to change. the bad things weren't happening anymore, and we decided i'd move in with him. i also was facing having to move anyway, because the house i rented got sold due to an aging owner's liquidation.
okay, so i move to tharen's a little sooner than we expected, but we had already talked about it. (oh, and i was stupid in love with kahlua clouds in my coffee.)
except it was right across the street from a bar that everyone we socialized with hung out at on any given night. eSPECIALly the weekends, oh my f god. i had just gotten laid off from a decent salary, tharon always had magic pocketfuls of money, and it was june. can you say memorable summer?
anyway, the summer of royal rock love crashed and burned miserably, but i digress - that's a story for another time. the important thing is we came out stronger for it and are still together. i got my fantasy wedding and two perfect baby boys, jack and jared. we live in an old and drafty, but quaint house with a big yard, fairly central to surrounding suburbs and city, and i have an....interesting life. stay tuned....