the man wants a page!

so, after about 4 years of me trying to get the dude onto myspace, tharen finally wants a page! that's where i'm spending the next week probably. i'll be using knowledge accumulated thus far, as well as whatever useful tidbits you lovelies pass along to me.

here's the deal. as you know, tharen's a musical god-like genius that can play anything, anytime. i'm not kidding. he has been given the gift of electric guitar strings for veins, but he also masters the bass guitar, acoustic guitar, drums, and vocal mic with a little piano thrown in for good measure. get it? measure? i'm very punny, you know. he's had so many of his ideas used and abused for so long that he's ecstatic to be able to develop himSELF finally.

some of the enthralling news you've been missing out on due to my inexcusable absence is that tharen is no longer a member of tossing logic due to a mutual sense of hating it. tharen's been hating it for a while, but felt strapped in because of the events going on that were to make them huge. it didn't happen (yet), but of course we still want them to sell millions of albums. money in the bank, right? not too sure about that, because you'd think it would've happened by now. whatever. tharen has been coming home unhappy after TL events for quite some time. this break up may have quite a bit to do with them not enjoying their '5th member' (apparently me), but i hope they enjoy the new one! (waylon's girl). i don't even want to discuss that garbage. check my labels for 'band drama', familiarize yourself with the story, and use your imagination. long story short? wtf did the snot faced twat THINK was gonna happen when threatening my husband's band/supposed livlihood with hater spewed opinion pieces, accompanied with venue desertion and boos? silly little tree. what kinda tree?

country sucks.

at least i never tried to tell them how music is done. i like to promote things like practice, passion, vision, networks...exposure, image.....and especially grammar and spelling, so they don't seem like a bunch of illiterate fuckwads...you know. anyway. chapter complete. thank christ. i haven't seen tharen this happy about his possibilities for a while now, and we won't be stuck with whiny bitchfests again! well, i'm sure we will eventually, but at least there will be cash involved, or a general 'fuck it-edness' about it. i know he doesn't want to waste any more time now that some has come available with the growing up of the kids. jack and jared require a little less solely dedicated time as the years tick by, it's just that tharen sometimes has a hard time pulling himself out of his self imposed holes to see his horizon of the future.

tharen's got a handful of other things going on right now. one band he's hired for just entered a popular competition and we'll see if they make the top 20 at the end of the week. another band he's hired for is some butterfly chasing rainbow puking country endeavor, but it's with a good friend of ours, the singer is super hot, and she has a distribution deal. *cha-ching!* then there's one other developing project he's a part of that i will have so much fun promoting when the time is right. it's a little more personal to me, considering i know and love everyone involved. the love of my life gets to beef up the crunch level with another of my most favorite people on the planet. (that's you, jeff!) and a good friend of theirs. oh! and finally, there's tharen's own music that he vows to "never give away the best stuff" anymore, lol! he'll finally have more than five minutes at the end of the night to work on things before he has to get some sleep.

the next while will be pacing the game on development and networking, so stay tuned for my journey! it's gonna be interesting! the path is bound to be a winding muddled incline, but we will deliver the goods required for greatness! there's also bound to be some laughs while tharen learns how to use pro tools and refinishes the garage into a new and improved studio.

~

hopefully...

...some old codger, or perhaps simple sam, maybe even a basic betty - any with money to burn - will happen across my blog and feel inspired.

feel inspired to grant wishes, that is.

see, teague here wants to write.
about stuff.
for a living.
...or at least a comfortable, fulfilling existance.

maybe i shall score with the blog browsers and get straight to the source - a publishing house extraordinaire! (please, sweet jeezuz! i've gots lots of material, and loads to say!)

i wouldn't be able to endeaver this on my own for at least 5 years due to our crushing bill load every month. truck and loans are to be paid off by then, so i will have the funding to properly shop my brain wares.

publishing would be an egotistical dream-mare come true! one way or the other, it WILL happen. technically, it already happened when i was 21 or something in a poetry library. i entered a 'contest' and supposedly out of thousands of applicants, hundreds got chosen with me being a lucky one.

in reality, it was an actual book. my parents and i each have a copy and it's a great big thing. the publisher said my poem went along with their 'approved themes' because it was about god. what they didn't realize is that it was MY version of god; but it was published, and here it is:

We are innocent,
we are pure.
We pray to God
and he says, "Yeah, right. Sure!"

It comes to me in
the peak of the night
to play with my head and
leave me dreading the
inevitable fright.


I may be innocent.
I could be pure.
But if I ever prayed to God,
he'd say, "Yeah, right! Sure."

©cmsept'91 (me)

Wiki says: The archangel Gabriel serves as a messenger from God. he first appears in the Book of Daniel in the Hebrew Bible. In some traditions he is regarded as one of the archangels, or as the angel of death. He is also known as Saint Gabriel to some Christian denominations.

Christians and Muslims believe him to have foretold the births of John the Baptist and Jesus. Islam further believes he was the medium through whom God revealed the Qur'an to Muhammad, and that he sent a message to most prophets, if not all, revealing their obligations. He is called the chief of the four favoured angels and the spirit of truth, and in some views Gabriel is the same as the Holy Spirit. Gabriel also finds mention in the writings of the Bahá'í Faith, most notably in Bahá'u'lláh's mystical work Seven Valleys.

yeah. so anyway, it turned out that the company gave out scholarships and stuff, but i'm sure it was only to people who spent their $cashola$ on the things they were trying to sell. for instance, i got a letter from them saying that the cadence of my piece was suitable for audio recordings, and would i be interested in having my poetry orally recorded? all i had to do was buy at least one copy and i could be on it! oh, joy. yeah. i've got somethin' you can do orally...

no, i didn't go for it.

then, there was the 'best of the decade' publication, or something like that. same deal. that was when i stopped opening their mail. i figured, if it was important enough, they had my phone #, right? they could call, i could screen it, and we'd all be happy! needless to say, they stopped sending mail, and i didn't get rich off my musings.

a big part of the reason i didn't want to do anything further with it is because it was from a poem that i half stole from my cousin when i was like, 16! I, um, extended on her one stanza work? hers was good and mine was better, but i always think of that. lesson learned! they are different pieces in their own right, and i suppose i could say hers inspired mine, but i'm not sure. honestly, i don't really remember the circumstance clearly, other than that i had really admired a few lines she had written down.

i need something of mine in print. something of mine from beginning to end, wonderfully bound, and with an enticing cover photo. if you ever see anything with the name teague rossdale, buy it, love it, and then tell all your friends about it, okay? thanks!

teague
= gaelic ~ poet
= welsh ~ fair, beautiful

ross
= americanized version of jewish 'rose'

dale
= middle english ~ valley
= irish ~ blind

i take it to mean:

'poet of the roses in the blind valley'

...or something like that.p.s. if i had any idea how to use photoshop, these pictures would have been somehow merged!...or this one:

~

i'd say it's a little weird

pursuant to my last post, said wife has been located. as it turns out, she needed a couple days to 'figure things out' and my friend is clueless as to why.

now, i figure it's 'cause she's fallen for one of the people that come into their 'open relationship' [read: fucking companionship], or he truly is a dumb ass male and doesn't know what he said or did to offend his righteous goddess. she still (as far as i know) hasn't spoken to him, and the police said she would call when she's 'ready' [read: done fucking].

i know i'm fairly judgemental here. i know i don't have all the information and i really barely know him anymore, AND i'm not sure why i care anyway. well, i really don't, but it's just that dream.....

are you ready for this? this is what i know about what really happened:
well, she threw on her grey hoodie, took a walk up the road, sat on the steps on the walkway around the lake, cried for a while, then got a friend to come pick her up.

huh. i don't know about the part with people splitting off into groups, though.

anyway, i'm sufficiently spooked again.
peace out.

sprung

thought i'd better check in. not too much going on, but i want to stay close to the computer for a few. see, my old friend's wife seems to have gone missing. they live a province away, but i still can't tear myself away just yet. i sent him a message saying i wanted to copy her picture and put it out to the people i know and that i had this dream last night.

fuck. they don't happen often, but to borrow a term: when it does, it do. (thanx janis....miss u, btw...) not much happened in the dream, and i didn't even make sense of it at the time. i originally put it off as the wine and lobster i imbibed with last night for my 6th anniversary dinner with tharen....which was awesome. fuck, can i cook!?! i took yesterday to remind him why he married me with a clean house, meal to drool for, cared for kidlets, and some sweetness. heh heh, i mentioned that to him and he said, "that's not why!"....but i went on to explain that it wasn't about why he LOVES me, just why he married me! heh heh...anyway, it was a pretty good day, aside from me still being ill. (that's why i haven't been on here much...my arms feel like lead cannisters....much too heavy to type with)

so - the dream. okay. i've never met the missing woman. my friend married her just over a year ago in his new town. he has a fairly successful business going on, and apparently they don't fight too much. just normal, aside from the whole 'open relationship' bullshit (which i don't get). i'm only in contact with him because we found each other (not sure who found who) on the social networking site we use. we caught up a bit, had a few interactions because of mutual friends, but that's it. no general contact at all, but i have seen a couple wedding pictures of the wife. and then i have this dream.

by a lake on a porch. brunette female in a grey zip hoodie sitting there crying. undecypherable yelling from a trailer. skip to next scene of a crowd of people dividing into groups.

and that's it. which isn't much. like i said, i didn't make anything of it at first. i thought it might even be me, but couldn't figure out why. THEN. i get onto networking site and see that my old friend seems to be missing his wife since yesterday noon when she went for a walk. cops involved and all that. fuck me if my head didn't start screaming into my brain!

i don't really know what to do about it....it's kind of hard to tell people that you have dreams like this. and i do. for real. dreamed deaths of uncle, grandpa, god-brother, princess diana, jfk jr., and a friend, among others. there also have been situations that happened in my dreams. and deja-vu? ALL THE TIME! knowing who it is when the phone rings? ALL THE TIME! gut feelings about people and been totally right? ALL THE TIME! i swear to god, or whomever the fuck needs to be sworn at. as if i would want to admit i can do that. but i have.

perhaps this is why my head always feels like it's yelling at itself.
huh.

oh ya - my title. i was walking around in my yard and noticed that spring seems to have sprung. i'm gonna have to work on getting that laptop if you ever wanna hear from me in the summer! donations?