politwitical leanings

hello, there! it's been a while, and not for lack of enthralling news, here we have a political piece.

this is a link to a letter from a new friend of mine to a local rag:
http://www2.canada.com/coquitlamnow/news/letters/story.html?id=c77a206f-92e0-4b89-9e1b-a8b607c7d294

i agree wholeheartedly, and i thank everyone who did vote, because it does matter. even if your party of choice did not get elected with a majority, you can still have your voice heard. write a letter. make a phone call. your local mla is your friend, and he/she wants to know what you think. people who don't understand the issues and choose not to vote - it only starts with your first article. google 'canadian government issues' follow any links you see...knowledge is power. voting makes you feel strong - try it...you might like it.
http://www.google.ca/search?q=canadian+political+party+views&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&aq=t&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&client=firefox-a

if you are a canadian citizen, you are just as worthy of having your voice heard as the politwits in parliament, white collar joe, blue collar steve, or suzy homemaker up the street.

~thank you, peace out~

answer: no, i wasn't that näive.

a while back, i wrote a post about waylon's girl wondering if i had been that näive when i was a little girl [read: in my early 20's]. well, i've realized that i probably wasn't. mostly i came to the realization on my own, because i know myself, i know how my brain has functioned, and i recall the depths into which my mind had been stolen on several occasions. the difference between myself and ms. knowitallandthensome, is that i actually educate myself when i ponder.

when i wanted to learn about say, the music industry, i paid attention. i went to the library. i asked questions. i didn't spew half stewed 'truths' to the world because i was aware that i could probably be better informed. i still am that way. i think the person who thinks they know every absolute truth on one or many subjects is the dumbest one in the room. i am all for voicing my opinion, and do so regularly, but i will let myself learn - i actively seek knowledge daily. tharen even notices the antsy disposition that i have about myself when i haven't anything to read in the house...i'm pretty sure i mentioned not too long ago about how i re-read my favorite book?...and i'd do it again when i have to, and i will have to. wow, do i ever digress alot. OOP! the a.o.a.d.d. is flaring up again!

i usually don't even get into stating opinions if i'm not certain. if i AM certain, though? i'll debate happily. properly. i also happen to be a yeller, so when the rules of engagement get crossed, i tend to resemble my emulate, the battering ram. (be nice!)

while i realize i should be more like:




the intelligent player, slowly calculating...



when i get into it, i'm usually more like:



nudging you with my knowledge, to put it nicely. you've seen what they do when they fight, right? i'm awed by that power, and tend to feel that way when i whip my posts.
wow. that sounded kinky. cool.


being wrong isn't a character flaw. the flaw exposes itself when the character starts being an asshole upon realizing the wrong.

i'm comfortable with being wrong...i just never am! (kidding!) (sort of!) but still. i don't act like a tit when i am.

anyways, the thing that brought me to this post was a little blurb in today's paper titled, 'in the world of miss universe' by doug camilli. the first line reads: "seriously?" and i can't agree more. WTF is with the world today? i am SO gonna have to write the epic 'blog on my feelings about it one day. damn, why are so many of the kids of today so idiotic and self centered?!?

i guess miss dayana mendoza, 22, this year's reigning miss universe went to guantanamo bay to cheer up some US troops! what a good girl. i'm sure she pulled up with a full tummy in her air conditioned, chauffered ride feeling really good about what she was about to accomplish. i mean really! what lucky girl gets to say she's been to a place that *gasp* president oBAMa talks about? [one link to why i feel sick]

"um, i like, heard about some *hair toss* tortures and icky things happening here, and um, that's like, *hand up* wack, and you burly boys totally didn't deserve that! i'm not even going to listen to all the nasty things that get said about your bosses! those pictures are totally like, photoshopped or something retarded. my friend skylar does that for like, work! isn't mr. barrack like, closing this place or something? yay! *sky punch* so, you can go home, and everything will be sooo cool! i'm soooo excited for you! *clapclapclap* it's almost summerrrrrrrrr!"*jigglejiggle*

kidding. i don't know if that's what she said, but i wouldn't doubt it.

wanna know what i DO know? after her appearance, she wrote in her 'blog about it. you know, about how when you think of gitmo all you can see is how "relaxing, calm and beautiful it is there?" see the quotations? that's a quote.

anyway, this was supposed to be some light hearted sillybitch bashing, but fuck...am i ever sick of little minds. that's why i tend to stay away from people sometimes. well, alot of the time. this is one chicken that does NOT mind being alone.

here's a poem, copyright, ME!

Thinking without reason -
there's a psyche somewhere
indulging in the depths
into which my mind's been stolen.

The happenings inside my eyes
are i think the realease of the panic monger.
Maybe the day when they cease to stun me,
I'll be laughing in my face.

©cmdec'92

~

a poem, if you will...

bear with me, friends...this is the first poem with nature as a stimulus that i have ever written, with a glimpse of the scene that inspired it....


Today is the Day I Awoke



Mossy trees
with ancient grace
towering up above me.
Chirpy birds
are feeding babes
ducking through clouds, they flee.

Dewey grass
perking right up
again greeting spring, I see.
Cool filtered sun
shyly peeking,
I have a commodity.

Crazy boys
on the other hand,
trash my reverie.
Bounding down
the puddled road,
abandoned sense of carefree.

Life awaits -
way far away,
saddled with calamity.
I awake -
now spring is here.
To nature I pay MY fees.

~teague2009march


(c) cb'09

i shall return.

dfkhns

feeling a little mixed up today.
i question certain friendshipS. yes, more than one.
sure do wish i could be nicer, so i could keep people like that hanging around to fuck me over even more! that would be awesome!
ooo, and people involving me in their shit...that's my favorite!
have you met me? rest assured that i will pull some iconoclastic heroism on what i believe about what you believe...don't like it....or me?
sometimes i have a big mouth, so fuck off.
fuck it.
i'm gone.
got shit to do.

stay tuned...we will soon be back to regular programming.

atrophicious - is that even a word?

i read too fast. that is a problem of mine, only because it leads me to the dreaded 'thinking time' when i've devoured everything readable. i've been getting back into reading actual stories more and more these days now that i have more time alotted for such certain 'luxuries'. i used to read all the time, every day. on the bus, lunchbreaks, morning, evening, and middle of the night. in the tub, passenger seat, park or waiting room....and even though it was usually a book, it didn't have to be. newspapers, online articles, archie comics, or the cereal box. anything and everything - all the time. my mom even used to bug me about having to come right up to me to call me for dinner while i was reading because i didn't hear her calling me! falling asleep was never an option without a book, unless i had something else to tire me out, wink wink.

then, i fell into the land of no sleep whatsoever and couldn't physically read because my eyes were burning and fell out of the reading habit. i just found that the only use for a book in bed after babies was as a pillow. it wasn't for lack of trying, though. i just had too many books that went unfinished because of lack of time or simple concentration at that point in my life. thank goodness that's changing. i really enjoy reading, and it's not something i was happy about giving up. i read almost every baby book out there, but soon enough the knowledge saturates and begins overlapping. i subscribe to my daily regional paper and a couple magazines, but that's not enough. i go through the local newspapers, all my son's school stuff, and still source info online about various topics. still not enough!

i told tharen that i had wanted that new 'twilight' book to read by stephanie meyer. i knew i wanted to read it before seeing the movie, like i usually would, if possible. well smack me like a fish! it was awesome! so awesome that i went right out and bought the second book in the series. and now i'm on the third, waiting for the fourth. i love the way it's written, even though it really is a teenager series! it IS set partly in a high school, but the language and tones would suggest a sophistication satisfactory to an adult audience. note the teen classing as more of a rule against foul language and sex, which i find refreshing. there's simply too much of that getting jammed down our throats incessantly. i think i've mentioned that before.

i must stress: do not get me wrong...i thoroughly enjoy sex, and i think you've heard me swear....i'm just sick of it being everycrazywhere, all the crazytime! i felt that way even before i had kids, so it's not about that. maybe it's the years of having worked 5 feet away from random revolving naked snatches first desensitizing and then repulsing me. maybe it was the anonymity that life assumes aside my opposing need for connection and meaning. i dunno. maybe i'm a bunched up ol' granny, but i don't think so.

whatever shall i do while i'm waiting for the next installment of the 'twilight' series? there will be a time soon when the third book, 'eclipse' is finished and i shall be dreaded to come up with things such as the sadness in some of my realizations.

like that one where i hate the devil's epiphany and joyous revery upon discovery that some of the basic fibres of morality and values seem to have atrophied....leads me to this:

read this book...i have, a few times:

'the tipping point' by malcolm gladwell

http://books.google.com/books?id=MMlxzMNkE_0C&dq=the+tipping+point&printsec=frontcover&source=bn&hl=en&ei=LEavSfz9GonOtQPRuvRz&sa=X&oi=book_result&resnum=4&ct=result


or at least check out this link:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Tipping_Point


and finally, answers from the author:

http://www.gladwell.com/tippingpoint/index.html


adios, muchachos
hasta...

hello there

been a while again.
time goes too fast, damn it! lots has happened again, and i don't know where to start.
asperger's! my boy doesn't have it!...or at least they think he doesn't. actually, he adds up to some fairly high scores in some areas, but not so high in others. not enough to add to a collective diagnosis in the one area. basically, i still don't have my answer. there were some rumblings about his core strength...maybe he doesn't have enough, and that's why he tires easily. huh. boot camp it is! bikini season is comin' anyway, and i kinda liked it when i made my husband proud on the beach! won't be much of that goin' on though if i keep eatin' those chips! man! yep. i could lose 10 pounds. fer sher. but still...not bad for two babies and no working out, but i digress...

jack's academics are right near the top of the charts, especially his math reasoning. i already knew that, but it is nice to hear. the social aspects and the message response and retrieval are a bit wonky, though. i suppose i have to try a little harder to put him in social situations, but the truth is that i know exactly where he's coming from. i am perfectly fine not being around people most of the time. i'm hard pressed to find more than a few memories of myself feeling lonely. all i can hope is that he does find someone in life he feels comfortable with. truly comfortable. it's been a rarity in my life, but it happens.

lovers and the odd friend have had that effect on me from time to time. there are some stand outs that still get thought about. not in the sense that i'd need them, but in the sense that they all add up to what i found to marry. certain people had my favorite found qualities, but then attached was a deal breaker, or the attraction just simply didn't have a big enough effect on either of us. the shitty things aside, that's one thing i've definitely known was where i'm supposed to be. tharen's aloofness gets aggravating, but maybe that's the wonder of him that allows him to put up with me! ya think?

i have to make an appointment with a paediatric physiotherapist for jack, and one with his teacher once i receive the hard copy of his report and decide what to tell her. most importantly, i'll be letting her know that i was told that there's no hope for getting help in the clasroom for a kid like jack. so it'll be up to her to keep reminding him to work while there's other kids in the class that so obviously need her intervention. that bites, but otherwise, it would seem as if jack's not capable because he's not finishing the requested tasks all the time. so...what do i do? you can't have a kindergartener bringing homework to do...that seems a little ridiculous, but when next year comes around he'll suffer because he'll think things aren't really required of him. i've always said that i want to add to his curriculum regardless, which is why i had him signing and speaking spanish and french. those things kind of got left onthe back burner once his social quirks became more apparent. i'm going to have to try to clear the hurdle of accepting what IS.

we are our kids' advocates, don't ever forget that. you have to seek answers and then make the toughest decisions as you try to figure out which answer to listen to. just because a doctor says something, that doesn't mean that's THE answer. doctors have been wrong before, and they'll be wrong again. i've learned what my gut feels like, and it's telling me that there's more to discover. if i were to be satisfied with what i'm told, i'd let jack take the lead and then have him looked at for ADD or ADHD in a couple years. that sounds too easy to me. there's not a hope in hell that i'm going to medicate my child for that. he's a boy, for cryin' out loud! if there weren't so many lazy parents and women who don't feel 'fulfilled' out there, i think this world could've raised a generation that takes responsibility. a generation that has too much pride to be so classless. a generation that at least has the couth to keep their filthy fuck ups to themselves. a generation that knows that if you don't do what's required of you in a society, that society and life's pleasures will shun you.

now, we're stuck with an era filled with people who don't know what's right, even if they wanted to do right. people who think they need more than their core. i know that i could've done more with my life, but i often wonder....would i feel this way even if i had more ambition? but then that sounds wrong. i do have ambition....it's just not for a big bank account. it's that i want to raise fully functioning, contributing men. i had my choice. i wasn't forced to stay home, and have actually tried to be employed out of the house. i just don't like it, and neither does tharen. i genuinely enjoy taking care of my family and i want to be there when they come home. even when they're teens and don't want me around.....i'll take that. i'm still going to be here. THAT is my job.

now off to boot camp....